Romance With Stress!

How many of you will be happy to do romance with stress?

My articles are filled with practical steps that anyone can follow and get guaranteed results.

Caution: Do not use more logic; rather use more emotions. Your stress is already using 100 times more logic than is required.

It was a dream-filled night at the resort on the sea beach of Kovalam (Kerala) without knowing what was in store in the morning for the newly married couple. The husband, Shyam got up in the early morning and called up the room service for tea but found no answer for long. So he went up to the tea board where he found the ingredients for making tea & made 2 cups of tea for himself & his wife, Ancy.

Shyam lovingly approached his wife with 2 cups of tea in both hands. But all of a sudden, his wife’s behaviour was shocking. She jumped up from bed and hugged Shyam hurriedly as if she was horrified by something. The tea cups fell from Shyam’s hands on the floor. Shyam could not think what was happening and he hugged his wife too and let her settle down.

What happened asked Shyam slowly.

Ancy: Where did you go? Do you know how much I got afraid when I could not find you near me when I opened my eyes? Never do this again.

Shyam: But I didn’t go anywhere, I was just inside the room itself. I thought I would make tea and then I would call you.

Ancy: How could you leave me alone and go to make tea on your own? I thought you left me alone in this hotel room and went back to your place.

Shyam: What nonsense are you talking about? Today is the second day after our marriage and if I want to leave you now and go back then why did I marry you?

Ancy: I don’t know anything but I am much afraid. (Sobbing) I don’t want to lose you, I have nothing else in my life. You are the only one whom I believe, the one I can depend on. I have never missed a single day to ask you from God after I saw you. It will not take a single moment for me to destroy my life if I ever lose you.

Now both of them settled down hugging each other, looking into each other’s eyes and smiling.

Ancy: Sorry dear, now I think I need tea. But you should wipe the floor immediately.

Shyam: Why should I wipe the floor? The room service boy will come and let them clean it. Why should I clean?

Ancy: No, no. Please, otherwise what they will think? We are just married and started quarreling with each other that too in the early morning! Please Shyam will you please clean it, baby? Do it soon before anyone comes with a tea.

With a romantic smile in her eyes, Ancy looked at Shyam as if she had requested something very huge task to her husband.                                                                                                                                             

Dear reader, if you are thinking about whether Shyam cleaned the floor or not, let me tell you that the answer is not the priority. But what is a priority is to understand the entire sequence of events without any judgment.

Take a pause before you read further. Close your eyes and see the entire events till now like a movie going behind your closed eyes.

Now whatever is going inside your mind doesn’t matter. Let me tell you that Shyam is a healer, and parenting coach for parents of autistic children and he is very much aware of the different family dynamics a person goes through, and the neurodiversity we have among each individual. And how drastic an accident it is if any normal family is struck with a case of ADHD to a new family member. Shyam knew about Ancy; her autism background. She had an autistic background in her childhood but is now managing things on her own. So when Shyam decided to marry Ancy, he was well aware of how different she behaves, and how every moment is going to be challenging to be in the relationship. But as he was a coach dealing with such people and seeing their challenges and how his clients were able to navigate through their challenges, he was confident that he could be a good friend, a coach, and a life partner to Ancy.

There is a big difference between Shyam and any other parent of an autistic child. The parents get an autistic child unexpectedly and they are overwhelmed with the result of their child becoming something they want to happen, whereas Shyam very well knew that Ancy was an autistic child and he willingly accepted to marry her without thinking of any result.

If you are a father or a mother of an autistic child and reading this article, my first request is to accept your child as it is and not think of a result of what you want to make out of your child.

The day you accept the reality, your life will be filled with divinity. God has chosen you to be a father or mother who can give light to a challenging person. Accept it wholeheartedly and you don’t need much autism advocacy, your parenting stress will be reduced drastically and you will feel the divine strength of parenting to an autistic body which delves a beautiful soul.

Continue reading my next blog. . .

With love,

Life Coach Sarat.